This piece is from one of our members, Simeon Malachy. He is also the founder/coordinator of the Exceptional Singles Network. Go ahead and read this up.
So, you have made the big commitment to be engaged to each other with the days to your marriage already numbered and agreed to by both of you. How will you keep the relationship in a good place and avoid pitfalls? Here are some tips:
Healthy communication is priceless. Healthy communication is the bedrock of a commitment headed towards success. Don’t allow a day end without reaching out to your partner either through Calls, Text messaging or via social media. You don’t have to talk at length on the phone at all times, once in a while call your partner and tell him/her, I just called to tell you that ‘I love you’.
Additionally, a beautiful morning text message can make your partner’s day glow. A lovely text message can go a long way to making your partner smile anytime s/he thinks about you. ‘If there was a restaurant that only served the warmth and affection of people, I would be a regular, and my dish would always be you’.
Engage in meaningful and educating conversations not gossips and vain talks! Don’t be over serious, be creative and include humors too. Your conversations should add value to each of you. Be appreciative! Say it out loud for your partner to hear. Lastly, do well to always make your communication bring a greater level of warmth, hope, and serenity to your partner’s mind.
Compliments goes a long way to making your partner feel special and valued. Affirmations creates deeper bond among partners. Dear Exceptional Gentleman, never forget to consistently remind your lady that she is beautiful and that you are proud of her and fully committed to her. Dear Exceptional lady, remind your man that he’s handsome and that you cherish and respect him.
Don’t assume that your partner is privy to your innermost feelings. Love is expressive. You have to let your partner hear it from your mouth that you love and care for him/her on a regular basis and importantly see it in your acts. Learn how to be more expressive to someone you’re committed to not just in your words, but also in your behavior, deeds, nonverbal actions and conduct.
Always be on the lookout to compliment and reaffirm your love to your partner daily. This season, cultivate the habit of always complimenting your partner and reaffirm your commitment to him/her. Affirmations are important, but acted affirmations is ‘importanter’.
#GIVE YOUR PARTNER A GIFT
The measure of love is largely seen in giving. It shows how much you care. It’s a show of gratitude and appreciation. But gifts shouldn’t be seasonal, it should be consistent not just in this season. Giving ought to be mutual in any commitment. Develop the habit of exchanging gift with your partner, e get why! You don’t have to spend your entire life’s savings to get your partner a good gift this season. Is there anything you can afford and you will love your partner to have, get him/her one. A book, a wrist watch, deodorant, a shoe, a necklace, a headset, a clothing item, etc. anything worth presenting will be cool. Send him/her a love card this season, it will surely be valued.
#USE OF LOVE NOTES/LETTERS
Always look for ways to show your partner that you cherish them. Writing notes and letters is a cool way to reaffirming your love and total commitment to him/her. A love note/letter does not lose it’s value no matter the number of times it is read. Love notes and letters can be revisited and read many times.
It is a great tool to create memories with your partner this season and beyond. Do you need love letters, notes, poems, and text messages for your partner and your loved ones today and always?
#MAKE MEANINGFUL MEMORIES
Meaningful memories are priceless, that’s why you should maximize every opportunity you have with your partner to make meaningful memories. Visit a garden or nature park or zoo and feed your eyes on the beauty of nature, go to the cinema to see a movie together, hit the gym to work out together, go out on a date, hold hands, smile, share hugs, be sweetly annoying and make fun of each other, snap as many pictures as you can, and do well to document every memory in your mind, and many more.
Pause in the middle of a conversation and whisper ‘I love you’ into your partner’s ear. Just make every moment s/he spends with you to be meaningful and worth full.
Dear Exceptional one, There really is no point doing what you should do with someone you should marry with someone that you will not marry. The tips above ain’t for peeps in an ‘undefined commitment’. Don’t continue to water an ‘undefined commitment’. PLEASE DON’T START OUT A COMMITMENT WHEN YOU AIN’T READY FOR MARRIAGE! Don’t waste your time, emotions, resources in something that is just ‘For the now’. Build friendships. Be intentional about friendships. E get why!
To those already in a marriage intended commitment, please understand that mutuality is very vital in a commitment, your sanity is very important. Love, Respect, Sacrifice, Faithfulness, Communication, and Inputs ought to be mutual. This is a topic for another day. Please don’t hesitate to leave any commitment that is abusive, deceitful and one sided. Evaluate compatibility before you decide to start any commitment. These things should be evaluated during friendship. Incompatibility among partners happens because of their failure to start out as friends without commitment in view. I will discuss more on ‘Why friendship is better than dating’ in the coming weeks in the group.
Exceptional one, this is not the season of love, love has no season. We are commanded to love daily. So today, do well to stay away from momentary fun that could cost you a lot in the future, and also avoid sensual pleasures in your quest to show and express love. To those in distant relationship, Respect your self and your partner by staying faithful not just today, but always! You were bought at an expensive price, please do well not to let your saviour down today or any day, keep your head high and make the most of today.
WRITTEN BY SIMEON MALACHY ( Exceptional Singles Network)
Search for EXCEPTIONAL SINGLES NETWORK on Facebook and join.